when I was pregnant I remember thinking, "I can't believe I'm going to be somebody's mom". Thinking of my own mother, she was always just "mom". I never knew her before as a person, so I guess I just always assumed she was always a mom and no one else. Never a person of her own. But for me, I have lived 32 years as my own person and then one day I was given a new hat to wear with the inscription "MOM".
So now I am Colton's mom and he'll never know me as anything else. And I think that's pretty fantastic, but when I sit and think about it for too long, I realize that it comes with a lot of pressure. I don't stress about it too much, because it's enough to make me crazy. But it's like all the good I've done in my life I need to pull all together to show him. To teach him and lead him in the right direction. I guess so far in his short 8 months of life both Jason and I have started him out right by just loving him as much as we possibly can. And loving each other matters a lot too. So, Colton if someday you are reading this, I'm glad you chose me to be your mom and I hope you think I've done a good job. Every day I hold you and think that I am so happy that I had you.
